((for an application))
Things happen. Crappy things. Sometimes people walk out of your life who you thought would be there forever. But that’s just the backstory, and while it was a learning experience, it’s not the learning experience. So there were a couple months of crazy crappy things. But then – oh then. Then there were a couple weeks of beauty. A couple weeks of walking outside in the morning to glance up to marvel at the vaulted “blue true dream of sky” (e.e. cummings), to stretch out my fingers to the grasp at the fiercely stubborn wind, to tilt my face up to greet the unrelenting shining sun’s face. I lay down in the dying grass and gazed up at the living heavens. The elements skimmed over me in nonchalant bravado – perfectly comfortable in their own glory. And I, lying flat on the ground, closed my eyes, content to be part of the dirt and the ground. I grasped my own insignificance – I am small, I do not stare down mortals for millenia like the sun, I do not evade their grasp and their sight like the wind, I do not spread myself that they might marvel at my hue like the sky. I grasped my own blessedness – I am small, I am given the gift to stare back at the sun but always blink first, to chase the wind but never catch it, to study the sky but never imitate its hue. I am blessed with the blessing of enjoyment and charged with the charge of preservation. I learned perspective richly. My life is an effort now to fit more perfectly in my place.
