Archive for March, 2008

this world is not enough II

this world is not enough
no satisfaction here
no overwhelming love
no great and mighty fear
this is not my home
my spirit can’t breathe here

so come and satisfy again
fill my heart with your loud song
pour down on me like rain again
fill my soul with your glad song

this world is not enough
no righteousness here
no traces of justice
no mercy for the poor
this is not their home
the orphans weep here

so come and satisfy again
teach the children your loud song
pour down on them like rain again
let the widows sing your song

this world is not enough
but God is drawing near
with eyes full of mercy
and justice he’ll appear
and with him is my home
my spirit dwells here

You’ll come and satisfy again
You’ll fill this world with your loud song
You’ll pour down like rain again
You’ll fill us all with your glad song

And the people will dance
The stones will cry out
Joining us in singing
of the Lord’s renown

Holy is the Lord who comes
the God faithful and true
He satisfies his rescued ones
God, we belong to you

And you’re more than enough

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this world is not enough

if you bust me out of here
i’ll follow you anywhere
holding tight to your arm
as we traipse through this place
and get out of here
we’ll run to heaven
on dusty feet
——-
i miss you
call me anywhere
and i’ll follow
no hesitations,
no regrets,
no looking back
i will leave all this behind
gladly
for a glimpse of your face,
for our wedding day

bring me home
to the place you’ve prepared me
like the faithful husband you are
i’m longing to get away from here
to be at your side forever
sweet lover

come take my hand
and take me away
we’ll fall like lovers into each other’s eyes
and everything else will fall away
we’ll be each other’s

you gave it all
for me to be yours
so there’s this ring on my soul
promising me to you
now make it final
sweet lover
bring me to the altar
and we’ll say our wedding vows

and then we’ll be together
joy, grace, and peace

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good christian / bad christian

It comes down to this,
at bottom, at core,
whether right or wrong,
am i yours?
i could care less about
difference of opinion
of course, sweet God,
i delve deep into you
digging far as i can
but all i come up with
is specks of carbon
compared to the great diamond of you
i know i’m hollow, imperfect, small
i’ll always be wrong,
so it comes down to this:
am i yours?

i will doubt the whole world
but i will not doubt this,
you cannot take this from me:
i am his

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Stolen from the Marriage Banquet to Be Taken to Court

No.
This is my wife, Father, there is no condemnation here; he lies about my beloved, your daughter, accusing her falsely of corruption when I have made her my pure, virgin bride. There is no flaw in her, only beauty, and your binding contract of adoption, sealed with my blood and proven by my faithfulness to this, my sweet beloved wife, your virgin daughter. I sought for her long and hard, and this deceiver intends to disrupt our marriage banquet? No, Father, I will not have it. My body has broken for her, my blood has spilled for her, and she will be with me in paradise today.

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puzzles and paradoxes iI

there’s more here
this strange atmosphere
of puzzles and paradoxes
a world unknown to me
but strangely like home
a heaven where instead of walking
i fall

farther down and all throughout
these many-layered sights and sounds
i sink and soar and take my tumbles
drenched in beauty all the way down
and you’re holding me all the way down

wind rushing past me
tears stream from my eyes
joy and pain
as i twist through the skies
your grace holds tight
your grace holds tight
there’s nothing to do
but give up the fight
and fall
you’re holding me all the way down
you’re holding me all the way down

all around me is blue and green
like springtime on earth
all the goodness before
perfected here now
in the yellow glory of your eyes

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paradoxes and puzzles

jesus, jesus
i want to praise you
but you won’t fit inside these words
jesus, jesus
let me praise you
let me find some better words

bigger than gargantuan
more poignant than malaise
prettier than pulchritude
you do more than amaze

you’re hotter than scorching
more precious than life
you’re sweeter than honey
and closer than wife

with terror that’s godlike
and comfort like friend
with a heart like a lion
and a heart like a lamb

you shout like a thunder
whisper like a breeze
hover like mother
stand off like a king

justice and love
entwine in your eyes
mercy and judgment,
caresses and might

paradoxes and puzzles
abound in my brain
of my jesus my daddy
who’s too big for a name

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damaged goods

how mixed can the signals possibly be
when i make it a point only to see you once a week?
listen, you sweet, sweet boy
how could i not love you as my brother
when you’ve been adopted with me?
but come into my room if you dare,
and i’ll show you all the reasons you can’t have me

see these photographs? it still pains me to look at them
these scraps of poetry, as recent as yesterday
that have not been written for you
songs that draw tears to my eyes resting
fearfully next to the victrola
this stack of old letters that will be in my attic
until the day my grandchildren clean out my house
memories, all of them,
that i’ll keep forever

but memories, like all good things,
must be gotten over
you see these memories are like hunters sometimes
they pursue me like prey
till i fall at their mercy
this room, once full of light and love, is a coliseum
see the bed?
all dusty
the mirror
cracked

i’m broken, boy
i’m damaged goods
not worth your time
or anyone else’s

it’s not an unrequited love for another man
that’s keeping me from you
it’s love that’s died and still twitching
you know, those death throes
before rigor mortis sets in

you don’t deserve that
you deserve fresh, young love
just born and full of hope
like spring, all virginal and green

move on
i’m haunted
i’m old

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abigail

did you see me, daddy?
my heart on my sleeve
and worshipping you
it’s only for you, sweet father
did you hear my praises ringing?
did you see my actions singing?
i know it’s selfish, daddy
but i want you to be pleased

find delight in me, sweet daddy
as i delight in you
i want to be your pleasure and joy
laugh with me, sweet daddy
let me dance with you
i want to be your pride and joy

come on, daddy,
let me put my feet on yours
you can lead me in a dance of salvation
with careful eyes i’ll watch your every move
and with clumsy legs i’ll try to match your grace
——-
my words an aroma in the temple of my God
my steps an inheritance of faith
my life’s whole fruit an offering to the Lord
my infant soul nourished by his grace

i grow into a strong, strong tree
with blossoms and fruit of goodness
i throw blooms up to heaven in my glee
a raucous celebration of righteousness

i assault the gates of heaven with praise
i pound at the door with stubborn faith
i won’t be stopped, i have a gift to bring
a crown to cast down by the throne

((stuff thrown together to be sorted out later))

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no title

i want to make a masterpiece for you
praise you like the renaissance men
with paintings that fall short of your glory
each stroke inspired by your humanity
let it be, let it be

i want to write a book for you
praise you like milton and donne
with words that fall short of your story
each letter inspired by your majesty
let it be, let it be

i want to sing a song for you
praise you like wesley and watts
with notes that fall short of angelic
each melody inspired by your beauty
let it be, let it be

but i’m a cracked pot,
a vessel of clay,
no genius here
or halo
i’m not clear of sin and dross;
i’m made of earth and suburbs
clinging to comfort,
safe and sound,
how can a life like that
ever prove your renown?

but let it be, let it be
silver not yet purified but proving your fire
let it be, let it be
a cracked pot sculpted to leak your mercy
let it be, let it be
broken faith a witness to your sweet grace
let it be, let it be
my being poured out for your majesty

((suggestions?))

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eidelweiss

a fifteen year old
lying on her back
on the floor
in her boyfriend’s parent’s game room
upstairs with the lights off
and grey light streaming in
through suburban blinds
the credits are rolling on the tv
and he’s pressed the mute button
they lie there
wondering aloud what it will be like
when they’re married

“how will you make love to me?”
she asks, all blue-eyed and innocent
he’s innocent too.
“when you walk in the door
coming home from work,
i’ll pick you up in my arms
and lay you down on our
white bed -”
he stops
because she’s unable to breathe
“i’m sorry, i’ll stop.”
she smiles
“just thinking about you turns me on,”
she blurts out brashly,
pretending for a moment
she’s not an innocent fifteen year old
who has trouble breathing
when she thinks of sex
he smiles, strokes her arm
“sh. i’ll stop”

they were so young, so foolish
with no plans but this:
they would be together

but you need plans in a real world
you need good grades and college degrees
and real jobs
not our fancy free dreams of
directing / acting / teaching / preaching
legacies we thought would change the world
one movie / performance / lesson / sermon
at a time
you don’t change the world
then come back for lovemaking
you go make plans break hearts and struggle through
god tears you apart

god tore them apart
and leads them on to different things
futures as unknown and blank
and starkly beautiful
as that white marriage bed is
to a fifteen year old girl
and that future still keeps her
breathless and wondering
and facing it with
tremulous joyful fear

that woman-child
takes the hand of a divine lover
and walks on

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